(I sit publicly) wearing an Ugly Hat & Lense-less sunglasses

[This was written/put-together: 12/26/08, beginning 7:16pm]

'I want to
beat my own path

That's walkable

To set the example
for others to follow’

[ABOVE Written at Green Mountain Coffee Roasters, 5-ish PM]

I don’t want to be a doctor.
Although I’m medically inclined,
The world is populous enough.
Prolonging humanity
Is more detrimental than anything, no?
Aren’t we running out of natural resources?
Trying to sustain this population
of greed…

I don’t want to be a photographer or a painter
Although this world is beautiful –aesthetically-
Why document what history tells,
Wouldn’t I be harping on the past?

I don’t want to be a philosopher,
I’d be too busy philosophi-zing…
Head in the clouds, looking down,
Too busy thinking about what’s important,
Not actually ACTing on such thoughts.

I don’t want to be a teacher
Aren’t teachers just pouring their pool…

‘Is it not just
a pool

Of what we think
should be taught
what that handful
of teachers
thought
should be taught
at a certain time
in our lives
at a certain point
in the scope
of what
that handful of teachers
thought
should be taught
at a certain time
in our lives
at a certain point
in that scope
of what
they thought
was right?’

[ABOVE an excerpt personally written 12/23/08, 12:05 am]

-Because aren’t these learners…
Humans, yes?

‘Were humans
we’re self-deprecating
we’re sponges
soaked with our own?’

[Same dated transcription of above]

I don’t want to be a therapist
“Fixing” some broken part of a broken person
Broken
by this corruptive world.

I don’t want to be
something I’m NOT

A person wondering
about themselves
Wrapped in the bewilderment
Of what-
TO BE

I want to be
this human Being
that I AM.


BEing, right?
Not some thinker;
THINKing.

…WRITing
then speaking
OUT LOUD
unless that is-

I’m INSPIRING

this over-populated world
to make a
change
about our lifestyles
our over-consuming lifestyle.
our humanity-
giving in
to our humanity
characterized by our self-deprecation
attempt at-
self-actualization…

Our attempt at
exisiting-
or others.

AND NOT OURSELVES…

That’s Maslow’s self-actualization theory, no?
ON ANOTHER THOUGHT…

Is the wish for self-actualization
Like wishing
for peace
in a world
that’s will inevitably be
at war,
wishing
for peace
while at war?
Ooooooooooooo
A disGUSting thought
…WHAT a sensitive subject.

But for real…

should I take this language of love I speak
this musical inclination
that inhabits my state
that drains the blood from my throat
singing my heart
OUT
my voice raw

-This forever rock
no matter how splt
into how many grains of sand
This forever MUSICAL rock
that puts the beat in my step
The stone I threw at others
The stone I hope others catch
The stone of my love
The stone I hope others mesh-
Through into others
Through into others
Through into the world

The world
that’s increasing ALL of, of this society
No matter WHAT continent
heritage
what move
over time
to what continent
country
state
county
town/city
house, room

It’s all the same, no?
We are all incased in a snowglobe
-Shaken-
by what’s above
the sky; ‘reflecting’ the water
the moon in orbit, pulling the tide in, the water
around us, this water…
hmmph

Are we not all in this snowglobe,
this here package
this here planet

TOGETHER?

WAIT

and if we stopped…

this ignorance, that’s what it is, right?

This trek
this scroll of our timeline
to-wards
self-actualization
that-
by most is ended (death!)
before ever reached
or
is it reached?
is death,
the end of our journey
to-wards
self-actualization….
because
-death-
is part of our self-actualization?

hmmph…….

We’ve all gotta eat
oh no, you know
sleep
keep shelter
exist…..!

but look at all these things
oh materialism
oh ChristmasKahQwanz/Giving-season/fa-la-la-la-holidays

that reminds us that materialism inhabits our bodies
with inevitable
evolution
forEVERerness
adaptation
and all that jazz;
the basics.

FUCK, look at me,
I’m still thinking: being a philosopher!!

Oy, the heads,
the people,
the following…

WHAT will the people
the ‘following’
the heads…

think
about the music
I play

the media
flowing
with the mainstream

the paddling
upstream
with the indie-rockers.

I kind of like the challenge
la padde
with the blister-blustering oars
‘gainst the wind…….

Isn’t it the struggle that keeps us trying
the egg
the chicken

struggling, trying
it keeps us moving
forward

When we lay still
are we going anywhere?

But what about the folks that are bed-ridden
ill
laying still
stuck
out of control
ill
and still
out of control
genetically
from chromosomes

Aren’t THEY the examples?
The perspective
The clock
That keeps us ticking…
Afraid
of the bed-ridden
and ideal end
dying
on one’s sleep
the world’s weight
-gained
The lines shown
on one’s face’the age
the dying of old age

FEAR
Oooooooo….

watch out from the end
you germ-a-phobe
you careful driver
you crosswalk walker
you step-back-from-the-curg-‘er’
because you’re afraid
(living in fear)
of the on-coming traffic…
forever
traffic
the always there traffic
that stalls YOUR moving forward car

EMPATHY